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The StoryTeller

  • Feline Slumber | Poem

    May 30th, 2024

    Sitting perched on a patchwork throne,
    Her feline form lays aslumber all alone.
    As if a purring engine, lost in meditation,
    Her world one of whiskered contemplation.

    A hunter’s farce with eyes of emerald gleam,
    She dreams of slumper, down a never-ending stream.
    Tiny paws, lain like mittens of snow,
    Twitch at the shadows, dancing to her dream.

    Gentle beast! To wrap you in a bow,
    You chase mice in memory of long ago.
    Your belly rises and falls in rhythmic tide,
    Your presence keeps me alive!

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  • A Running Start | Poem

    May 27th, 2024

    A sight to behold, a marvel of mass,
    A man overflowing, built to surpass
    The average frame, a walking display
    Of epicurean habits at play.

    He laces his sneakers, a herculean feat,
    His belly a mountain, his breathing discreet,
    Then charges forth, a rumbling tide,
    Leaving asphalt in tremors, nowhere to hide.

    With each labored puff, a thunderclap booms,
    Accompanying tremors that shake all the rooms.
    Dogs scatter in terror, birds take to the sky,
    As he waddles and wobbles, a glorious guy.

    Onlookers all gasp, some clutch at their sides,
    Convinced he’ll combust in a shower of fries.
    “A heart attack’s coming!” they silently plead,
    “That poor, foolish fellow, its a foolhardy deed!”

    But wait, don’t be hasty, rest your soul,
    This run isn’t penance, to meet a set goal.
    It’s not for a marathon, a six-pack, or fame,
    This man is on a journey, and that’s not a shame.

    He runs for the sunshine, the wind in his hair,
    For clearing his head and a moment to share
    With his body, a friend often taken for granted,
    A vessel for laughter, for dreaming, enchanted.

    So laugh if you must, at this comical sight,
    But remember, dear reader, all journeys take flight
    With a single first step, a tentative stride,
    No matter your size, there’s your health to confide.

    In movement, in laughter, in taking a chance,
    So let the fat man run, in his own joyful trance.

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  • Where Socks go Missing | Poem

    May 22nd, 2024

    In chambers deep, where shadows lie,
    A humming beast with a hungry eye.
    The Washer of Woes, with churning maw,
    Devours the stains, both old and raw.

    With belly round, of porcelain white,
    It holds the spoils of day and night.
    Socks that have strayed, and shirts astray,
    All destined for a watery fray.

    A twist and a turn, a gurgling song,
    As soapy suds the battles throng.
    The spinning drum, a frantic dance,
    Whirls clothes about in joyous trance.

    But oh, the grumbles, the rhythmic groan,
    As heavy loads the gears bemoan.
    A symphony strange, of gurgle and churn,
    A washing-day dirge, by mortals unlearned.

    Then silence falls, a sudden hush,
    The beast appeased, with final swish.
    Clean garments lie, in dampened heaps,
    Victorious spoils from foamy deeps.

    So hail the Washer, the churning friend,
    Whose hunger ends, when cycles end.
    A marvel of man, in kitchen’s hold,
    A tale of suds, in times of old.

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  • FLOORBOWL RPG Excel Game: A Skyrim Inspired Adventure!

    May 17th, 2024

    Welcome to FLOORBOWL – a turn based RPG game inspired by the world of SKYRIM!

    floorbowl_rpg_excel_skyrim_v1-3Download

    Story – check out the Youtube Video here : https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZEAf0yIqdf0

    You are the Wyvernspawn – once profesized and long forgotten. Your memory is foggy, your head is heavy – you have no memory of your journey or what foul deeds led you here.

    You try to look around but find you are gagged, tied and bound. All you know is you must escape this prison!

    Be it fate, luck or the will of the gods – but outside sparks sudden action. There is no need for planning, as chaos has broken on all sides. The horns of war have been blown. Perchance escape has drawn its card for you.

    Guards rush blindly into your cell, removing your bounds and releasing all within the cells. The fear in their eyes sends chills down your spine.

    You, and your fellow prisoners bolt for the door, moving just in time as the roof of your cell collapses, crushing all that still remain within it.

    The dealer of the damage is shown to you. A foul lizard like abomination is above you. Tales of old flash into your mind – ahead of you is a Wyvern, a dragon beast, long thought of vanquishsed from a time now forgotten.

    Adrenaline spurs your legs onwards as you flea from this place. Without realising it another travels with you – a prisoner of similar fate – now companion on your journey. This campanion you urges you on your journey, to SteamTree and reporting of the Wyvern’s sudden return!

    INFORMATION AND GAMEPLAY

    There are two key game components to understand to get maximum fun

    1. Mapping and Questing
    2. Battling

    Mapping and Questing
    The ‘Map’ tab is the central hub of this game – where you and your party will seek to save Floorbowl from the latest threat.

    • You and your party are represented by the Red Circle
    • Towns/Shelter (and quest locations) are in Black
    • Moveable land is in white (pure white for plains, grey for protected lands)
    • You can move your party using the arrow buttons (Cells DT32-DV41)

    If you are ever stuck – refer back to the quest log for clues, or head to the nearest town to see if that will help!

    Fast Travel
    To quickly travels across the map consider using the fast travel buttons in cells DT69-DX78

    Battle Mode
    Note – If at any stage the battle mode seems too hard. Start a new campaign with ‘Disable Battle’ mode switched to yes, this will disable all battles and allow for peaceful adventuring/questing.

    Battles can leave your party outnumbered – anywhere between 1 to 5 enemies will spawn to fight your party – so be prepared at all times!

    Battles use a simplified version of DnD mechanics, with four features important to understand:

    1. Initiative: The world of FloorBowl uses turn based battle mechanics. This means each creature takes it in turn to move and attack. The order of this is defined by an initiative dice roll, where the highest roll gets to go first. This order is set in the first round of combat and stays consistent throughout the battle
    2. Range and Movement:
      Battles take place on a wide battle arena, where distance is important.
      Each creature has their own movement they can achieve each turn, as well as different ranges of attack.
      You can only attack a creature if you are within range.
      Melee creatures for example can only attack when they are next to another creature, but ranged attacks can benefit from being at a distance

    Make sure to track the distance between your party and your enemy!

    1. Targeting an enemy
      This is essential and often forgotten – do not forget to update your character’s targets each turn (cells H13-J13) to strategically tackle living enemies
    2. Hitting an Enemy
      Once you are in range of attacking the enemy, we now need to see if your attack hits or not.
      This hit roll is all based on armour class and randomly probability.
      If your roll falls below the enemy armour class, the attack will miss.
    3. Damage Calculation
      Each weapon and attack move has the capability of hitting a range of damage. This damage scales with your level
      Details on what dice and bonuses are added to your attack role are shown on the Character Stats screen (accessible via the map)

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  • I made a Fortnite Inspired Battle Royale Game in EXCEL

    May 3rd, 2024

    Excel Royale is a turn based battle royal game much like your favourite Fortnite or PUBG games. The goal is simple – SURVIVE!

    excel_battle-royale_v1-1Download

    Check out the Youtube walkthough of Game Mechanics and Gameplay here: https://youtu.be/cU4DnBpa1Ho

    ENJOY!
    Game Mechanics Overview:

    Use player movement buttons to progress your turn

    Inventory
    Travel to grey cells to scavenge for the best gear
    There are 8 weapons to get and 5 armour types

    Fog of War
    Visibility is limited to only a five cell radius around the player. Enemy movements beyond this are hidden from view

    Ring of Doom
    On turn 15 an electric ring is spawned on the map. You need to get within this ring by turn 30 otherwise it is an instant game over.

     Battle Mechanics 

    Battles occur automatically using DnD lite mechanics. Each character in the battle gets 3 chances to attack. On their attack chance  there are two components – 1) Chance to hit and 2) Damage delt 

    1) Chance to hit are influenced by attackers accuracy (scaled with weapons) against an enemies armour class (determined by armour worn). This is a random roll (between 1-20) of the attacker adding their weapon modifier vs enemy armour class (AC). To hit you must beat the enemy AC.

    2) Damage delt per turn is a random roll between 1 and X, where X is determined by the weapon held. The outcome of these battles occur automatically and you are informed who wins and who is left behind. 

     Consider Donating: All our games are free – and will remain free, but if you would like to contribute it would be greatly appreciated.                                      

    One-Time
    Monthly
    Yearly

    If you like the games we make – maybe consier making a one time donation?

    Make a monthly donation

    Make a yearly donation

    Choose an amount

    A$5.00
    A$15.00
    A$100.00
    A$5.00
    A$15.00
    A$100.00
    A$5.00
    A$15.00
    A$100.00

    Or enter a custom amount

    A$

    Your contribution is appreciated.

    Your contribution is appreciated.

    Your contribution is appreciated.

    DonateDonate monthlyDonate yearly


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  • Thursday Slumps | Poetry

    May 2nd, 2024

    It’s Thursday night, the air hangs heavy, thick,
    The weight of work left leaden, weary and sick.
    Four days we’ve toiled, the weekend’s distant gleam,
    A mirage shimmering within workday dreams.

    The spark is dull, the once-bright fire burnt low,
    Motivation’s embers flicker, faint and slow.
    The keyboard clicks feel foreign as hands move ever slow,
    Each task’s a mountain, my patience all but starts to go.

    But wait, a whisper of Friday’s gentle call,
    Just one more hurdle, then freedom shall stand tall.
    A surge of strength, a final, desperate push,
    That sweet release, a taste we almost brush.

    So power through, though eyelids droop and sigh,
    The finish line is near, beneath a clear, blue sky.
    For Friday beckons, with laughter light and free,
    And soon, this Thursday slump, a distant memory.

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  • Game Dev. | Poem

    April 28th, 2024

    A world unfurls on the screen’s bright stage,
    Born from pixels and lines of coded rage.
    Once just an echo in the mind’s dark hall,
    Now mountains rise, and heroes heed it’s call.

    With brushstrokes light, we paint the landscapes vast,
    Forests whispering secrets with a blast.
    Each line of code, a guiding hand,
    Building dreams grand on grains of sand.

    The soundtrack swells, a symphony of sound,
    Bringing life to battles fought on hallowed grounds.
    From laughter’s chime to fury’s crashing beat,
    Every note a world, both bittersweet.

    Then comes the test, the player’s touch ignites,
    Does our world breathe? Do heroes take flight?
    For in their hands, our dreams find final form,
    A universe we built, weathered by the storm.

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  • I made a Fallout inspired RPG game in EXCEL

    April 21st, 2024
    fallout-like-excel-rpg_v2Download

    Check out the video here: https://youtu.be/jh-42-7L7B0

    Story

    It is the 145th year of the second age. Life in Mercer is unrecognisable to that which came earlier – The bombs saw to that. Humanity may never fully recover…
    Adventure beckons once more, and you are ready to answer its call!

    How To

    Mercer is the home of a Fallout inspired adventure game

    There are two key game components to understand to get maximum fun:

    1. Mapping and Questing
    2. Battling

    Mapping and Questing

    The ‘Map’ tab is the central hub of this game – where you and your party will seek to save Mercer from the latest threat. – You and your party are represented by the Red Circle

    •  Towns/Shelter (and quest locations) are in purple
    • Moveable land is in green (light green for plains, dark green for farmland)
    • You can move your party using the arrow buttons (CellsAZ2-BB6)  
    •  if you are ever stuck – refer back to the quest log for clues, or head to the nearest town to see if that will help!    

     Battle Mode

    Note – If at any stage the battle mode seems too hard. Start a new campaign with ‘Disable Battle’ mode switched to yes, this will disable all battles and allow for peaceful adventuring/questing.

    Battles can leave your party outnumbered – anywhere between 1 to 5 enemies will spawn to fight your party – so be prepared at all times!

    Battles use a simplified version of DnD mechanics, with four features important to understand:  

    1. Initiative: The world of Mercer uses turn based battle mechanics. This means each creature takes it in turn to move and attack. The order of this is defined by an initiative dice roll, where the highest roll gets to go first. This order is set in the first round of combat and stays consistent throughout the battle                      

    2. Range and Movement: Battles take place on a wide battle arena, where distance is important.   Each ceature has their own movement they can achieve each turn, as well as different ranges of attack. You can only attack a creature if you are within range.          

    Melee creatures for example can only attack when they are next to another creature, but ranged attacks can benefit from being at a distance Make sure to track the distance between your party and your enemy!                              

    3. Hitting an Enemy : Once you are in range of attacking the enemy, we now need to see if your attack hits or not.     This hit roll is all based on armour class and randomly probability. If your roll falls below the enemy armour class, the attack will miss.  

    4. Damage Calculation: Each weapon and attack move has the capability of hitting a range of damage. This damage scales with your level Details on what dice and bonuses are added to your attack role are shown on the Character Stats screen (accessible via the map)  . 

     Consider Donating: All our games are free – and will remain free, but if you would like to contribute it would be greatly appreciated.                                      

    One-Time
    Monthly
    Yearly

    If you like the games we make – maybe consier making a one time donation?

    Make a monthly donation

    Make a yearly donation

    Choose an amount

    A$5.00
    A$15.00
    A$100.00
    A$5.00
    A$15.00
    A$100.00
    A$5.00
    A$15.00
    A$100.00

    Or enter a custom amount

    A$

    Your contribution is appreciated.

    Your contribution is appreciated.

    Your contribution is appreciated.

    DonateDonate monthlyDonate yearly

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  • I Made a Life Sim Game in Excel!

    April 20th, 2024

    Weclome to ExcSIMulator – the excel made Life Simulator Game!


    Life is like a box of cholcates – you never know what you are going to get!

    This game allows you to live out many different lives. Will you pursue wealth, job satisfaction, uplift your skills, romance or all of the above?

    exsimulator-excel-life-sim-game_v1Download

    There are three game modes to choose from:

    • Easy: You were born with a silver spoon in your mouth
    • Medium: Life has its ups and downs but you make it work
    • Hard: Life has been tough the last 18 years, lets change that!

    To do list each year:

    1. Set your routine – maximise the 24 hours to pursue all that life has to offer (green and red cells)
    2. Set your relationship goals (pink sells)
    3. Check your finances (purple sells)
    4. Set a skill target (dark green cells)
    5. Check your career pathway, change careers if you get bored
    6. Check out the housing on offer – buying may be better than renting forever if you can afford it!

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  • Cell by Cell | Poem

    April 19th, 2024

    The cursor blinks to a steady beat,
    A challenge laid by blank sheet.
    Rows and columns, stark and white,
    The battlefield is bathed in fluorescent light.

    Numbers march to a chaotic throng,
    Debits clash where credits belong.
    Formulas weave, forming a cryptic spell,
    Unraveling truths that no ledger can tell.

    Fingers fly with a blur of speed,
    Macros dance, the digital breed.
    Charts unfurl, a vibrant fight,
    Unmasking trends with pixelated might.

    The grand total, a sacred quest,
    One keystroke, my success confessed.
    A sigh escapes, a silent cheer,
    I found victory in this spreadsheet frontier.

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